Spring is gone.

Two weeks ago we had a spring.

Cherry blossom was beautiful a week ago.

Tiny migrational fish has a transparent body, that is symbol of spring, came up the river few days ago.

Cherry blossom petal fell down on the ground. Now the green of the leaves is so beautiful.

Spring buds along the river are so beautiful. We are in kayaking season.

Spring is gone. But some flowers are beautiful.

We are in an early summer.

See you spring next year.

２週間前にやっと春が到来したようです。

１週間前に桜が満開に。

数日前、春の風物詩シロウオが、いつもの練習場の川を遡る。

桜の花びらは散り、新緑の葉が美しい季節に。

川沿いの新緑は本当に綺麗で、カヌーのシーズンの到来を感じる。

春はどうやら去ったようだ。

初夏に入ったようだ。

春よ、来年までさようなら。

Cheers,

Yota Kano

Where are you who wrote lots on the journal book??

ゼミの要旨を書き終えたが、プレゼンのシート作りが進まない。きっかけがつかめない。一年やってない弊害がここにきてでている。こうしてゆっくりと僕は普通の日本の学生が戻っている。

ところで、学校が始まってから、明らかに本を読む時間と物を書く時間が減っている。

一冊のノートを一ヶ月で書き終えていた僕はどこへ行ってしまったのか？？

そして、僕はその減った分の時間、何をしているのだろうか？？

確かに４月からここまで、朝練、学校で作業、昼、作業という生活が続いてきた。そして、また夜から作業というような生活だった。本を読むのは昼と寝る前の数十分と物を書くのは昼くらいだ。まず顕微鏡作業で目が疲れるので、終了すると無気力になってしまう。

しかし、やりようではまだまだ時間を作れるのだろう。無気力でたたずんでいる時間が使えるのだ。そんなにも追いつめてやりたくもないのだ。"Take it easy"という言葉に惑わされる。

やりようなのだ。しかし、こんな代わり映えのない生活が続いていると、本当に物を書く題材もない。振り返ってみると、「本当に物を書かなくなった。」とか「新鮮さがない。」という言葉が目についてくる。結局、何かの新鮮さを求めてカヌーに繰り出す日々となってしまう。しかし、それも何も変わりないことなのだ。

家に帰り、カナダの写真に目をやると、その時の自分があまりにも別人に見えてしまう。「本当にいたのか〜。」とか「あれは僕じゃない。」と思って見ていることがある。

あの一年、いろいろなことを考えていた。今ではすべてを思い出せないが、すべてが新鮮だったように思う。写真に移る自分も今とは全く違って見えてしまう。カナダの話をしていても、その物語が自分の話ではなく、むしろ誰か知らない人の物語を伝えているかのようだ。事実、その語られている物語の主人公は僕本人であるのだが。

見た人は一部しかいないが、友達のJoeが撮ってくれたParks Canadaの‘Yota Story'を見ていても、映っているのは他人にしか見えない。

写真と同じ姿になるのは、カヌーをしている時ぐらいだ。

あのとき物を書き綴っていた自分は、何者だったのだろうか？？今の姿が本来の姿なのだろう。僕は、もうごく普通の日本の大学院生だ。一つだけ、勉強にあてる時間とカヌーにあてる時間が同じくらいということが違うだけだ。英語も聞けなくなってきたし、読むスピードも遅くなってきた。

何かが違う。

2 months have already past since I came back to Japan. Gradually I am back into Japanese ordinary graduate student. Yesterday I finished writing a presentation summary. But I cannot start making a presentation sheet. It is because that I did not do it when I was in Canada.

Anyway I have not written my journal often like when I was in Canada since I started new term.

"Where are you who wrote lots on the journal books??"

And what am I doing except studying?? I think I have a time to do it.

I have done a routine work since this April. Kayak training in the early morning, Studying in my laboratory, lunch time, studying, supper, school and sleep. At the lunch time and few minutes before going to bed is the time to read books. And I write my journal at the lunch time sometime. Sorting the sample is so hard work. I get tired after finishing this. I don't feel like doing anything after that except kayaking.

Well my Canadian big sister, Jenn has kept writing her journal almost everyday. She was actually traveller then. But now, I think she is one of the resident of Haida Gwaii. I guess she has kept doing it right now. Why is she able to write journal even she is in Canada??

I don't have anything to write on my journal. Ordinary student life make it like this. Looking at my journal, I see the phrase that I have not written the journal recently. I go kayaking to seek something new to write. But it is not right. Going kayaking is just part of my ordinary life.

Looking at my pictures on the wall in my room, who was in Canada 2 months ago looks so different from now on. It is not me.... Now I feel that it is strange for me that I had been in Canada for a year. But I actually was there.

I thought lots while I was there. Everything around me was totally new. Nothing was old. A guy that is in my pictures is not me. He is..... Who is?? I cannot tell. Sometimes I can get a chance to talk about my life in Canada. Then I tell my story as if I were talking the story that is written by someone I don't know. Actually the main character of the story is me.

I often see the film "Yota Story" that my friend, Joe made and lots of my friends in Canada saw. Sometimes, while seeing it, I feel that Yota is an unique Japanese traveller. I think where he is living now. I am totally different from Yota who is in the film.

I enjoy the time when I go kayaking. Just it.

Who is he who had written journal in Canada?? Where is he gone?? It might have not been my self. Myself in Japan and school is true myself. I am getting worse at English. Contrarily I am becoming ordinary Japanese student who cannot use English well.

Something is wrong, I think. Is it right??

Cheers,

Yota Kano

First canoe race in Hokkaido

ゴールデンウィークも終わり、再びいつもの日常が訪れています。雨と晴れが交互に僕の前を去って行く天気もそろそろ終わってほしいものです。いつになったら春らしくなるのだろうか。

連休は、釧路で釧路川100キロカヌーマラソンの大会があったのですが、そこでカナダクイーンシャーロット諸島で作ってきたパドルを使ってきました。

今回は、カナダに行っている間に出場し、惜しくもゴールできなかった後輩のゴールを演出することが僕の役目だったように思います。あまり、順位も気にせず、ゴールできれば良いと思っていました。気楽にカナダのパドルを使ってみようと。

雨のせいで川は水が多めで、前半は今まで見たことのないような瀬が待ち構えているのでした。沈はしませんでしたが、さすがに水を汲みます。水抜きの時に、船の側面にどうやら穴をあけていたようです。気付かずにゴールしていました。前半は、カナダのパドルは使うべきでないと判断し、（前日の練習で、ハイダのパドルがラダーを打つとしなっていたので）後半から（５区）投入されました。

クイーンシャーロットにいた７月に一度だけ同じようなパドルを使っていました。その時の感触が最高で、冬に自分用を作ろうと決めていたのです。

後半は、すべて自作のパドルを使っていました。先が尖っているので、入水の時の抵抗が少なく疲れない、ブレードが縦に長く、横に狭いので、余計な水をつかまないようでした。雰囲気、アリュートのパドルに近いのでしょうか。市販のパドルに比べて圧倒的に長い僕のハイダのパドルですが、終始あまり疲れず、かつしっかりと漕げた気がします。

前半はだらけてやっていました。まあラダーで操船するのでやっとなのでしょう。後半からスイッチが入ったようで、ピッチをあげて漕いでいました。静水に近くなるとやる気が湧いてくるのです。後ろから、バウマンを叱咤激励して漕いで、結果二位という成績になりました。どこからか水が入ってくるのに気付いていましたが、それは無視していました。

ハイダのパドルのおかげとしか言いようがありません。漕ぎやすく、疲れないパドルでした。さすがは、海洋で漕いでいた人々のパドルだけあって、持久戦にはもってこいなのでしょう。ゴール後は疲れ果てていましたが、終始全区同じピッチで漕いでいたことは不思議です。カナダで一年漕いでいなかったから、体力などないと思っていたのですが。僕の体にハイダの精神が乗り移っていたのでしょう。一年漕いでなかったとはいえ、毎回２５キロ近い荷物を背負って旅していた分、体力がついていたのかもしれません。

ともあれ、後輩のゴールをお膳立てしてあげるレースは、二位というおまけ付きで終了しました。その彼も喜んでいたようで何よりです。しかし、二位になってしまったということは、後は一位しかないというプレッシャーに押されるということですね。

残りの連休は雨が降り、寒かったので思うように漕げませんでした。すぐにレースの筋肉痛は治ったのですが、残念です。

今、自分のパドルは先端が傷だらけになり、側面も傷があります。それも良い思い出になっています。自作のパドルを使うという目標をまずは達成しました。次は手塩川にデビューです。

ハイダのパドルを日本で作りたいと思うようになってきました。師匠の勘違いで、センターの部分が弱いので、次ラダーを打ったら折れるかもしれませんね。

Hi, my friends

There were the holidays last week. I took one week off from school. I went to the east of Hokkaido to participate in canoe race on May 1st. I paddled for about 90 km.

Last year, when I was in Canda, my friend could not reach the goal. He was not allowed to paddle further from a final check point. He was supposed to reach the check point at 2 pm.

My aim to participate in this race was to have him reached the goal and use my haida paddle. Water level was so high due to the heavy rain a week before. The first half of the river is whitewater section. So we are needed to have a technique. But the second half of it is flatwater. So physical strength is needed. I decide to use my paddle in the second half not to break it.

We paddled well. Specially my paddle helped a lot. Sharp point made it easy to put it in the water. Long and narrow blade did not catch excess water. I could paddle so smooth. Haida paddle was so awesome paddle. I thought it is so developed for hours paddling. But it is not good for whitewater paddling.

I had him reached goal. And in addition to it, we were the second place. He was so happy with the result. If I paddled 7 minutes faster, I would have been the first place. Finally I could not win the race. But it does not matter. The first aim was not to win the race. It was to reach the goal and use my haida paddle. Everything in the race owes to my haida paddle.

Haida paddle might have given me the some strength. And I paddled with the spirit of Haida Gwaii. Thanks so much.

Next canoe race will be held in June. It is a kind of sprint race, short distance, around 20 km.

Then I use haida paddle again. Kayaking and canoeing is so fun.

Anyway end of this month I go to get a license of tree climbing. I plan to get an instructor license in this year. Tree climbing will be my third hobby.

Cheers,

Yota Kano

Banning doing slackline by nasty professor

学校の教員駐車場の前に一本の大きな松の木とトウヒの木が立っていて、二本の間隔は素晴らしく、スラックラインに最高である。

帰国してから何度となく、練習してきて、この二本の木のおかげでだいぶ上達したのを感じている。

週末は幾春別川にカヌーの練習に行ってきた。さすがに、土日みっちりと練習してしまったので、体が重い。函館は、最近久根別川も春なのに水がほとんどでないし、波もなさそうだ。大野川で練習するべきなのだろうが、愛用のスラパドがひび割れで病院入りしてしまったので、練習意欲が湧いてこない。

そういえば、最近カヌーばかりしていて、スラックラインをやっていなかった。上半身も重いので、朝、体幹を鍛えるためにスラックラインをすることにした。８時から９時までの学校が始まる前の少しの時間を練習にあてることにしたのだ。

始めて３０分、続々と教員がやってくる。

「綱渡りか。すごいな。」

と関心を持って、声をかけてくれる。なにもやるなとは言われない。日本でマイナーなスポーツに興味があるのだろう。

そして、戦略講座の工藤先生がやってくる。

「何してるんだ。木が曲がるだろ。人間の力がかかった時の木にかかる負担を考えろ。やめろ。」

と言われる。

当然、カナダUBCのキャンパスで学生が楽しむ姿を見つめ、友達と公園やUBCのキャンパスでやってきた僕には全く納得がいかない。木を痛めないようにタオルを巻いて保護している。you tube でも公園で皆が楽しんでいる動画が沢山ある。

どうやったら人二人の力で木を曲げられるのか？？重機を投入しないとあの二本の木は動きもしない。まったく彼は分からず屋の何者でもない。舌打ちをしながら、睨みつけて、うるさい工藤先生の話を聞いていた。ばかばかしいとしか言いようがない。どうせなら木を動かしてほしい。言うからにはそのぐらいの力があるのだろう。

あんなことを言ったのは、単に運動の出来ないことの腹いせを僕にしてきたのだろう。運動音痴、何もできない彼が、僕がするすると綱を渡るのをみて妬みをおぼえたのだろう。なさけない大人である。うっとうしいの一言につきる。

先生一人に言われるならば、事務に許可を取れば良いと思った。許可を取っていると言えば、何も言い返せないはずだ。とりあえず、学生係へ。学生係の人は、

「前から見てきて感心していた。自然のものを上手く使って、創造的に遊ぶのは、関心していた。素晴らしい。」

と。

しかし、木のことは営繕係らしく、営繕係に聞きに行こうと言われる。聞きに行くなり、一蹴された。

「構内の木は国有財産だから、一切の使用を認めない。」

と。

学生係の人は、

「海外ならそんなことはないんだろうけどね。これが日本なんだよ。役に立てなくて申し訳ない。」

と言ってくれる。

縦割り社会の日本、アウトドアスポーツに風当たりの厳しい日本。もとから、許可なんか取れるはずもないと思っていた。今まで、散々カヌー関連で提言してきて、一蹴されてきた過去があるからだ。危ないことは、やらせない雰囲気の日本が嫌いだ。もう黙ってやるしかないだろう。縦割りでもなかったら、対等に訴えることもできるだろう。しかし、学生の僕は、単なる底辺だ。上から一蹴されるだけだ。

今日の一件でさらに日本嫌いが顕著になってきた。一部の人は温かく見てくれるし、賛成の立場を取ってくれるが、工藤先生のような頭の固い人間が権利を利用して、学生を抑圧するのは最低だ。対等に話をできる環境がなぜないのか。あの時、彼は明らかに学生という僕らを上から目線で見てきた。あのとき、対等に話ができるのならば、状況は変わっていたかもしれない。日本はダメだ。学費を払っている立場なのだから、学校の施設を利用する権利は少なからずあるはずだ。たった少しの時間、木にスラックラインを張るくらい何の問題でもないと思うのだが。日本の学校は不自由だ。そのぐらい自由にやらせてくれないと、個性的な学生も生まれないし、学生の多様性も失われる。

これからも、学校で続けたい。これに屈してスラックラインをやらなくなったら負けに等しい。認めてもらうまで。なぜ両者の妥協点を見つけて、容認する姿勢を見せないのか疑問である。頭が固すぎる。こういうくだらない教授がいると学校の印象はさらに下がる。

I went kayaking often this month. I go training in the morning and go to school. And in the late afternoon I go training again and go back to school. I go back to home at late night around 12 am. I go kayaking for study. I study for kayaking.

I went kayaking last weekend. I enjoyed kayaking and trained so hard. I came back yesterday midnight. I went to school with short sleep. I wanted to go kayaking yesterday too. But I had muscle pain on my back.

Anyway I thought that I have not played slackline for a little bit long. There are 2 nice pine trees in my campus near the parking lot for professor. The distance between 2 of these pine trees is so nice to play slackline. I have played since I came back to school. I got better at it owing to these 2 trees.

I started playing it in this morning with my friend from 8 to 9 am. In 30 minutes, lots professor came in to the school staring at us. And they say.

"What are you guys doing?? It is awesome. Do you have a competition??"

"We are doing slackline. I learned it from Canada. No we don't have a competition. Just a training for kayaking."

Almost professor did not complain about it. They were curious about it. But one nasty professor, Kudo who studies salmonid came toward us and said.

"Don't do that. You guys are hurting the trees. Human power that you guys doing against trees is considerable. If you do that constantly, the trees eventually bent. These trees are belonging to the school. You are not allowed to use it."

Actually I roll the mat for the trees not to hurt it. And I dismantle the set every time not to break the gears. We just play it for a few hours. He does not understand our care for trees.

He is totally nasty guy. I hate him.

After that I went to school office to get a permit for doing slackline in the campus. An officer of student affair section allowed me to do that. He said to me that.

"I was watching you doing that there. I was interested in that. Using the trees and playing such a sport is so awesome. It is good for us to play in our nature. I am impressed. I want to give you a permit. But actually this affair belongs to other section."

But permission for using trees is belonging to a building and repairs section. So he took me to the office. And the other officer said to me that you cannot use it. These trees are belonging to nasty government.

Finally I found that it is impossible to get a permit. He said to me that.

"If we were in US, Canada or Europe, you can use it. But here is Japan. I am sorry that I cannot help you."

Japan is generally strict for outdoor sports. Government is so stubborn to give a permit. Student is so weak against government. Our opinion for school are not reflected. We are paying the tuition so at least we have a right to use things in the school. It is not fair.

I don't like Japan.

Anyways I don't stop playing slackline in the school. Stopping it means just a defeat. I don't want to be treated like that and obey. If I see him again and he says same things, I quarrel against him. I disobey him.

Social structure is so vertical in Japan. So it is so hard for young people to raise a cry. Japan is actually beautiful and nice country. But the custom is so nasty.

Oh, my kayak paddle broke. I ordered new paddle today.

Yota Kano

Graduation ceremony

Graduation ceremony of my university hold yesterday. Many of my friends graduated. They wore the suits and attended it. I went to take a look at the ceremony. They looked so happy to graduate.

I met there and met my friends after a year. They did not change.

If I had not gone to Canada, I would have attended the ceremony with friends. But I chose a different and an unique way in 2009. It had been my dream to go to North America specially Alaska or Canada. I wanted to study fishey and anthoropology. I tried to take an enough score of TOEFL but unfortunately I could not. Then I thought that it will take so long to study abroad. So I decided to go to Canada with working holiday visa.

I took year off from the school in 2010 and left. In Canada I found new interests and views on the world. It was so awesome. From the views of the ordinary students, a year off can be regarded as negative thing. But it does not matter.

I became more unique than before. I got the new interests and views on the future world. It is the importance of the sustainable life and Community Economic Development.

Looking at the students who graduated, I was strongly sure that my decision to go to Canada in 2009 was not wrong. Life in Canada made me tough and smart at making the life path. I thought that I have to go back to Canada in the future. Speding a time in the school for just 2 weeks, I found that I don't want to study in an university in Japan anymore.

Anyway I came to Sapporo yesterday after the ceremony. I came here to take a test to evaluate my English after having spent in Canada. I took today. I thought I got better. But I could not do well. I think it was 60 % of my English skill. I am so slow reader to answer the questions in the limited time. I could not. Speaking section was so difficult because topics was out of my interests. Although I could not do well, I am satisfied with it because I got better at listening. I want to check the score early. The score shows my ability of English. The score in 2009 was 51/120. It is so terrible.

I met my friend who traveled almost whole world when he was 2 grade. He took a year off too. He is choosing his life path too. It is so fun to talk with him because the view on the life is so similar with him. I plan to study abroad in Thailand this summer. He is a typical traveller.

He stayed with me when I was in Hakodate in 2009. He change his faculty. He moved out the faculty of fishery then. When he stayed with me, He encouraged me of applying the visa. If it had not been for him, I would have not gone to Canada.

Thank you so mucgh, my friend. I go back to Hakodate tomorrow. Back to real life again.

Cheers,

Yota Kano

Do my best everyday.

I am still staying with my friend. Actually I should decide the house. I have been easy-going. Life in Canada made me much more easy going. It is not bad thing. Everyone around us are so hasty to do everything. My friend too. He tries to do lots things in a day. I want some cloths, shoes and so on. It is not necessary actually because I have in my hometown. When I hang around with him, he suggests me to buy and do everything in a day. But I say that.

"I don't wanna be hasty. I take a time because I have lots of time."

My way of thinking is not Japanese but Canadian.

I am trying not to watch TV but to read articles on the web. I have nothing to do for people at all right now. So I get mad when watch it.

Getting mad and going to regard myself useless are so bad for our health. So I and he decided to enjoy the life and do our best everyday. I do slackline almost everyday and he joins too. He is getting better at it. And we went kayaking today. It was too windy and cold to paddle long. After that we planed to do slackline but did not. It was cold and we did not have enough time. Keeping up shape may help and must help when we are allowed to go volunteering.

But just enjoying slackline and kayaking is not good for me and him. We have to set the target for it for a year. For example, jumping on the line and participating in national kayak competition and trying to get on the good standing. But I think we don't have the target right this time. So we are thinking about it.

And I started studying step by step. I printed some research papers, and I am reading it. Today I attended the workshop on introduction to Japanese International Cooperation. It was so fun. I learned lots because I plan to work with JICA after my graduation. Specially it was about on the aspect of recipient countries. So attendance were almost exchange students. Just only 2 including me were Japanese students. And couple of professors and one from JICA office.

It was focused on the proposal of project from the developing country. I discussed about with them and did presentation in English. English was used in the workshop.

I think I could discuss well. However I could not do well at presentation. I felt that I got better at it than before. It was really nice opportunity for me to do it. Needless to say that I have lots room for improving for sure.

It was strange for me that professors are really impressed by our English. Other Japanese student who studies in the opposite side of my laboratory. She was good too. Was my English good?? I don't think so. It is true that students are not good at speaking, writing and reading. They can just only read. Professors are worrying about their English.

Anyway life in Canada helps me a lot. Then I thanked my friends for the conversation and so on. They said to us that we forget it as we are in Japan. They suggested us to speak English frequently even in Japan. So I want to chat often with my friends in Canada not to forget it. Keep talking English.

Thank you my friends in Canada. Keep in touch. I am so thankful.

Cheers,

Yota Kano

Start of my life in Japan

I got back in Japan on 10th. It was my birthday and first day in Japan in 2011. I was excited to come back. I did not feel anything about that devastating earthquake.

I called my mom and grandfather and told that I came back. I told them that I go back on saturday 12th.

"See you on Saturday."

I hung up the phone. I left the airport and went to my friends house.

At my friends house, I talked a lot about my travel. I enjoyed japanese meals.

On my first full day in Japan, I relaxed and read a book about sustainable life. At 14:46, we had the biggest earthquake in Japan. In a few minutes big tsunami waves struck the east coast. The place I visited with my family and club member. I was shocked by that scene from the TV. I held my head in my hands for a while. Finally I cried quiet because I could not grasp why it happened on my first full day in Japan.

I was thinking what I can do for people in Tohoku region where I grew. But I found that I have no any skill to contribute. I found that I am so helpless. I learned how to use a power saw from my friend. I think I can use it but it is not perfect. I can contribute if I have a power saw.

I helped my friend stacking a firewood and cutting logs by power saw. I got a skill and ready to go there whenever I can with a power saw. I really wanted to go there but the situation has been so terrible. I think it looks getting worse. People in Fukushima are in danger of a nuclear radiation. And people lost their home starve and eventually die. It is so sad. Watching TV I feel helpless all the time.

One day, maybe on 15th, my mother called me. She said to me that go back to Hakodate and find your place to live for a year. Just in case, keep the refuge for us in Hakodate. Her suggestion was right. I can not resist her suggestion because she is in a stricken area and danger of a nuclear radiation. I think that my mom and dad have known that I am helpless right now even if I went there. I decide to go back to Hakodate passing through over Fukushima.

I booked a flight immediately.

At last I came back to Hakodate where I study on 16th. Finally I could not meet my family and talk about my travel in Canada. I was really really looking forward it. My family must have been sad that they cannot hear from me. I hope I go back there early and talk. Now my mom and sisters went up to north far from the nuclear power plants. But my dad helps patients in hospital. He is so so noble father.

I became a refugee too. But I am so lucky because I have a money and so on. I would have been in the stricken area if I had been back in Japan earlier than 10th. I planed to come back on 1st or 2nd in March when I was in Japan. I changed it in last July. It was right decision.

My stuff is safe in the house. We did not loose anything. So I feel so sorry for people lost their home and property. I want to help but I cannot do now. The thing I can do is just to donate. I donated 55 bucks. I think it is not enough. But I have to live too. It is the limit.

I have stayed with my friend since then. He is so helpful. I am so thankful. We watched TV about the devastation almost everyday. And we felt helpless and got mad. Specially

He was helping his and my friend in the 10 to 20 km area of the nuclear power plants. He moved out his house and was trying to figure out how to go back to Hakodate where he studies. So I helped too. He figured his money to come back. So we told how to get to Hakodate from there. He will be back on 22nd. I hope he comes back safely.

I came back to school yesterday just to meet my friends in my laboratory. The board on the wall that shows where he or she in the laboratory is has my name. A remarks about me was "he is in CANADA". I came back. So I erased it and wrote "Back in Lab."

I met my friends after a year. I said.

"Hello. Long time no see you guys. How have you been??"

They looked fine. Everything changed and New laboratory member was in. But the desk at the corner had my some stuff. The copy of letter from the Canadian embassy of Japan and a flight information from Tokyo to Vancouver are still there. It reminded me of the time before I leave for Canada. Then I was so so excited to go to Canada and dreamed a lot about the life. I looked at it and enjoyed planning and dreaming of the Life in Canada. I was so happy to see that and missed that time. I felt that one year passed so fast. I am in Laboratory from traveling in Canada. I am back in a real world as an ordinary student. But I think I changed a lot in my mind, thinking and attitude but my looks. One notable thing I changed is what I stopped drinking entirely.

I went to have a supper with my friends. It was a familiar scene when I was in Japan. I felt that I am turning into a ordinary student and back in the real world. Some parts of me reject my becoming a ordinary student. So some time I speak English. I try to speak it. But it is no good because nobody understands well. I am still confusing. In a casual conversation, I feel easier to speak English than Japanese often. I want to.

And it is so easier to introduce myself when I meet someone new. Japanese hesitates. So I would like to use English. I found it when I met some new laboratory members.

Specially at the super market or the stores we talk little bit in Canada. Cashier says to me that.

"How are you??"

"I am good. Thank you. And you??"

"Thank you. I am fine. Anyway your hat is so nice."

"I made it!!"

"Really!! It is beautiful."

Is it unusual?? I think talking little bit is common, isn't it??

I like such a talking with somebody I don't know. It is so great. There is no such a custom in Japan. So I confuse. I want to and try to. But I should not.

Japan is good too. But I prefer Canada to Japan in that.

Listening to music I missed Canada so much. I looked at my pictures. I really felt that I am back in school. It will be hard for me to finish it. Then the memories in Canada will give me a strength to overcome it.

I am in a tough situation. I think I find my way because I got strong after living in Canada. I am totally new man so life is totally new. That is why I am confusing. I should not back to old style. I have to make it totally new and different from before.

Cheers,

I am fine.

Thanks my friends in Canada for worrying about me. I am grateful and glad that.

Yota Kano